I was living a lie, says England gay footballer Casey Stoney

Monday 10th February 2014
ENGLAND Women's defender Casey Stoney has revealed she is gay.
The 31-year-old was talking to BBC Radio 5Live as part of a special feature on homophobia in football which will air on Thursday night, where The FA’s Head of Equality and Child Protection, Sue Ravenlaw, will join the debate.

It also comes as the annual ‘Football v Homophobia’ month, an initiative backed and supported by The FA, is currently underway.

Stoney, who has earned 116 caps, said she was inspired to tell her story following the positive response diver Tom Daley received when he came out late last year.

She said: "I was living a lie.

"I've never hidden it within football circles because it is accepted. But to the outside world, I've never spoken about my sexuality.

"I feel it's really important for me to speak out as a gay player because there are so many people struggling who are gay, and you hear about people taking their own lives because they are homosexual. That should never happen. 

"How can I expect other people to speak about themselves if I'm not willing to do that myself?

"I looked at the response that Tom Daley got. It was incredibly positive, and I thought 'wow the world is changing and it's time for me to stand up and tell my side of the story'.

"Those three or four people have given me the courage to say I'm gay."

Stoney captained England at Euro 2013 and donned the armband for Team GB at the 2012 Olympics.

She went on to explain how fear had prevented her from discussing her sexuality before now. But she said she has reached a point in her life where she is comfortable being open about her private life.

Stoney added: "For the last 10 years I've always cared too much what other people think.

"I was frightened of the stereotypes, frightened of being judged, frightened of what other people might say, especially the abuse you can get through social media.

"But I think I'm in a place where I feel so comfortable in my own skin, I feel so loved by the person I'm with, that I feel I can face anything.

"In the past, I made up lies about having a boyfriend or acted a certain way because I felt like that's how I had to act and be accepted by the modern world.

"But I wasn't happy doing that, because I was always lying, and lying to myself as well."

She continued: "Can you really be happy, can you really be yourself? If you are not comfortable in yourself and you are not comfortable in social settings or your surroundings, how can you go into a team environment and be yourself and train hard and feel relaxed with your team-mates if you don't know who you are?

"It's taken me many years, and help. I've worked with a sports psychologist on certain issues and it's been a struggle, but I've got here now."

Heather Rabbatts, Chair of The FA’s Inclusion and Advisory Board, gave her support to Stoney.

She said: "This is very welcome news. Casey has been inspired by Tom Daley to make her announcement and we hope this in turn, inspires others in the same way.  We’re confident the news will be well received and offer our unstinting support to her."

Basildon-born Stoney has been an integral part of women’s football for over a decade.

She also had the honour of leading out Team GB in the London 2012 Olympics.

Known for her consistency and leadership, she has played for some of ladies football’s biggest clubs, winning major honours along the way.

She signed for Chelsea Ladies when she was 12 years old, progressing through the youth ranks at Stamford Bridge, before making the move to north London to Arsenal in 1999.

She made her international debut before moving to Charlton Athletic in the summer of 2002.

Having played for her country at every age level, Stoney got the call and a substitute appearance against France in 2000 making her a full international.

It was two years later that she made her first start for the Lionesses against Norway and has been a key member of the squad ever since.

Whilst many more international caps came, Stoney led Charlton through the club’s most successful era, winning three trophies in two years, including two FA Premier League Cup wins in 2004 and 2006, sandwiched by an FA Cup win in 2005.

Despite the success, Charlton Ladies was dismantled, following the relegation of the men’s team from the Premiership. This resulted in a move back to Chelsea in 2007, where she had a brief spell as the club’s player-manager in 2009.

In March 2010, she announced that she was joining rivals Lincoln Ladies, where she is captain and plays today.

Her international career has continued to flourish. She was part of the squad that reached the final of Euro 2009 and played every minute of every game during the 2011 FIFA Women’s World Cup, where England reached the quarter final.

She described being made England captain as ‘an absolute honour’ and the ‘biggest privilege' she’s ever been given.

In 2012, she was named as the Football Association’s International Player of the Year.

Article courtesy of http://www.thefa.com/news/governance/equality/2014/feb/england-defender-casey-stoney-reveals-she-is-gay#oeiDQlO627iLtaHs.99